Valet Service #14525

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The Story

It’s a slow day at the Highway to Hell Hotel parking lot, so Jake the part-time valet plunks himself down on a ‘53 Plymouth coupe for a little breather and a cigar. It’s time for this skeleton to rest his bones. Ah, yes…feels pretty good to take a load off, even if the load is apparently pretty light already. It’s great to relax in the sun for a stretch while contemplating things and listening to the birds chirp.

One thing for certain about Eternity, it sure takes a while. So why not hang out and have a smoke if business is slow? The boss won’t even care. He’s here for the long haul too. Chances are, the boss is probably smoking an Old Crypto-Nite stogie himself while watching old western reruns in black and white. He’s seen every Tarzan movie 47 times.

Sometimes there’s a big tent revival nearby which always means considerably less traffic on Route 666 coming past the hotel. It’s then that road to Great Beyond running in front of the hotel can look downright empty. Business slows to a crawl. In fact, just last night, some preacher was spouting fire and brimstone in the next town over to give people a different set of eternal options. Of course, that meant people were taking a different path to Great Beyond instead and the traffic count fell faster than a wet witch can melt.

I wonder which guest drove here in a forklift? Or is that machine used by the hotel to eject freeloaders?

How about that classic ’53 Plymouth coupe for a spook-mobile? Doesn’t look like much, but it’s a good and reliable daily runner. These days, it runs entirely on a fifty-fifty blend of ectoplasm and imagination which is totally emission-free. The air quality around the town of Afterlife is actually pretty good if there were lungs around to breathe it.

Location: the parking lot of the Highway To Hell Hotel, Route 666, in the town of Afterlife, Pennsylvania.

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